Mommiocrity

When I was thinking about having children, I remember fearing that I would become boring. I couldn't figure out the mechanism, so I concluded that it must be a myth the idea that parents are not interesting people. Well, I finally figured it out. I'm a parent now and I just don't have time to do interesting things anymore. Tillie needs to be fed, bathed, cleaned up after, entertained, exercised, and kept out of danger. These chores can be quite fun and sweet, but they take up 3 to 8 hours each day, depending on if I have a babysitter to help out. I have only two hour blocks of time to get anything else done when she naps, and that is not enough time to accomplish anything of substance. With a child, I can't afford to make less money and spend time on nonpaying or low-paying work projects, which tend to be more exciting. I can't afford the time or cost of extravagant travel or hobbies. I'm so worn out mentally that I can barely get away from the television after the kid goes to bed. I have read exactly one book that was not about child-rearing or pregnancy in the last 2 years. The idea of having a second child really frightens me. Is it really true that the most creative thing that I've accomplished in the last couple of months is watching a whole season of Project Runway? Would I have done even that if I had a second set of wiggling fingernails to trim?

Juice Time

Such a crazy-wonderful week that I must catalog its highlights: I turned 33 and threw a dinner part for 10--pumpkin ravioli with zucchini-leak soup. I'm still eating the wonderful leftovers. Then I pulled an all-nighter, which was horrible, but afterward my client seemed appropriately guilty for having forced me to. Today while I was jogging with Tillie, some random lady shouted out "You go girl!" Apparently, I looked awesome (or perhaps like I needed some encouragement, but I like to think the former). And the cherry on top is that I am in love with our dreamboat elect. I spent the entire morning reading about him and his family on wikipedia. I have more brothers and sisters than he has, which so far seems to be his only shortcoming.

Bizzy Weekend

Tiny Giant Squid

Difficult to capture on film, the elusive Architeuthis uses powerful and multitudinous tentacles to position its meek prey near its snapping beak, shredding its flesh with a toothy tongue. As quickly as the ferocious giant attacks, this insatiable juvenile inks and flees.

Sad Pumpkin

Someone doesn't have very much patience for her momma's holiday projects...

No Ho-Of

Our talented friends Amy and Mike just finished a renovation that will be my new home office and craft/utility room. It took 2+ months to complete it. It will probably take me that long to move into it and get it organized. I know that I am nearing middle age, because my greatest fantasy right now is taking a week off to clean and organize my house. This will never happen. That's the real time-kill of raising children. You can't just lose yourself in a project for more than the span of time it takes the little one to nap. Sigh.

If you knew what the side room that used to be Scott's office looked like before, you will be blown away. Here is a sneak peak:

Lego Sorter Extraordinaire

What did Tillie do last weekend?

Fuzzy Wuzzy Was a Plant

It turns out I have my own little stink blossom. No, I'm not talking about Tillie--how dare you think that about her!? I'm talking about this little euphorbia plant that my friend Chia gave me for my birthday last year. It surprised me by shooting out a funky bloom a couple of weeks ago. I finally got around to photographing it earlier today. I guess it was waiting for the attention, because not 2 hours later it opened to reveal an incredible blossom! And it even stinks like old meat. (Faithful readers will remember my last encounter with such a stink bud: Click here, then scroll down to the post for August 12, 2006.)

Here's what it looked like at 10 am this morning...

And again at 12 pm--just two hours later!

If you get real close you can see how furry it is...

But, don't get too close, because it smells like someone dropped a slice of ham behind the stove a few weeks ago.

Eat This

Leonardo de Tilnci

Tillie thinks that crayons are fun. They also taste good.

PS. We found the monster!

LOST: Monster

Ooops. I have been letting Tillie take her favorite toy along on walks, and we somehow lost it today. Now, Tillie isn't really old enough to have a favorite toy that breaks her heart when it has gone missing, but apparently Scott and I are. I backtracked twice--once on foot and once in the car to try and retrieve the little dude. Then, I got a strong dose of sad eyes from Scott when I finally admitted that his favorite was AWOL. I was tempted to put up missing monster signs all over the neighborhood, but instead I went on Amazon and ordered 2 more. Hopefully, I have the right product, or I'm not sure Scott will speak to me ever again. Have you seen him?

How Tillie Relaxes

Cupcake for a Cupcake

Tillie's tapas party was a great success. Many tapas were eaten. A mob of citizen journalists documented the mauling of at least one cupcake. Tillie seemed to enjoy joining the ranks of two other experienced one-year-olds. She is no longer a baby now, but a little girl who looks like a baby.

Mmmm!

Yes, they spell TILLIE : )

The crowd encourages her.

A young lady takes a tentative, yet elegant nibble:

The spread:

Friends play.

Laptops

Shortie Shortz

Tillie saw me doing a crossword puzzle the other day and grabbed the pen out of my hand. Then, she yanked the crossword from the table and, with her little grubby fist clutching it, started pressing the pen against the paper and scribbled. It was so cute! I was completely blown away because I had no idea that she was watching us use pens and paper. She also mimicked me holding my hand to my face and sneezing this afternoon. And, Scott caught her yesterday holding a battery pack up to her face and babbling as if talking on a phone. Watch out--she's watching our every move!

What's a four letter word for "adorable"?

No wait, I know this one...

Okay...next is 29 Across...

Cupholder

Little Monkey

UPDATE: My apologies, I just looked up what the former title of this post meant--absolutely NOT what I meant to invoke!!! I am an idiot.

One Year Ago...

...I was huge.

My goodness, Tillie turns 1 in just two weeks. We went to a new friend's 1st birthday a couple of weeks ago. He didn't like his cupcake, poor thing. Why is it so much fun for a bunch of adults to stand in a circle around a freaked out little kid staring at him in great anticipation while he tentatively tries his first bite of birthday cake? I mean, that is a lot of pressure on a little guy. We love cake. We dream of having the chance to taste cake for the first time all over again. We think, if only it were possible...no, instead I'll just experience it vicariously through this young child. Yes, let's feed this kid cake and just savor his reaction. It will be the closest we can ever get to our beloved youth. I'm starting Tillie on a daily regime of muffins in preparation for this big event. She will LOVE her cake damnit!

Sofia

Tillie's nanny brings her own daughter, Sofia, who is 4 months old. She is so cute! She is kind of creaming Tillie in the hair department, but when I point this out to Tillie, she reminds me that Sofia can't even roll over on her own yet. Good point--Tillie is still the cutest. I like it that she gets to play with another child every day. I think daycare will be neat for this reason. She will get to have her own relationships with peers. I hear that when they get to be about 3, it gets quite dramatic all the little mini soap operas that take place at daycare.